My name is Molly and I grew up in an amazing family. Parents married over 35 years and still best friends, a brother a year and a half older, always someone I looked up to and an identical twin sister with which I share a bond so special that most people couldn't understand.
Growing up an identical twin was incredible, of course I don't know any different. We were and still are extremely close, some may say too close. We played every sport together, had the same friends, were always by each other's side. So much so that after high school we both even battled a severe three years of anorexia together. As twin you're always being compared, it's inevitable and it's comes with the territory we say. So as we slipped deeper and deeper into our eating disorders and lost more and more weight, we also alienated those closest to us. We lost our friends and began to even shut out those most important to us. Our family. We were so deep in it fearing one of us would be labeled the "bigger" twin that our world around us was crashing down. We lost key years of our lives when girls experience college and start to date and go out. Instead we were trapped in this disorder and living in a world where only we existed.
After years of battling and the constant comparison of measuring food and exercise we were exhausted. But one great fear we had next to death was not having kids. We both dreamed of becoming moms and always wanted kids of our own. 3 years of not having a period a full blown osteoporosis we feared we would never become mothers.
We slowly made progress to recovery. It was so hard to feel our clothes against our skin and to hear people say that we've "gained weight" but we had to try and remember the bigger picture and by the 4th year our periods came back. Anorexia I Believe will forever be a part of my life but it's me that has control over it now. I still have my good days and bad days but in the end I know what's most important and what keeps me going. My dreams of becoming a mom.
And as for being a twin, there will forever be those comparisons. Emily (my twin) had her first baby a year ago. To see her as a mom is so incredible but being a twin I often get "Molly, when are you having a baby?" Or "you're next." It can be hard to hear sometimes like something is wrong with me but I know now that if I want it I can do it on my own.